Spoof songs

[M. Caecilius]

In 1848, Joseph Victor von Scheffel wrote a song about the Battle of the Varian disaster, known in Germany as the "Varuslied" or by its first verse "Als die Römer frech geworden".

http://www.volksliederarchiv.de/text609.html has the German text, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qyrwweY5QVA the melody.

I'll attempt the translation here, which is not really all that poetic. The song is fun to sing in the original, though - try it even if you don't speak the language!

"When the Romans became cheeky,
simserin simserim simsim simsim
The marched to northern Germany,
simserim simsim simsim
In front, with the trumpet's call
Terätätätäterä
Rode the General Field Marshal
Terätätätäterä
Mr. Quintilius Varus
Wau, wau, wau, wau, wau
Mr Quintilius Varus
Schnäde räng täng, Schnäde räng täng
Schnäde räng täng, de räng täng täng

In the Forest of Teutoburg,
Huh! The wind blew so cold
Ravens flew through the air,
And there was a foul odour
As from blood and corpses.

Suddenly, from the forest dark
The Cherusci charged boldly
With God for King and Country,
They threw themselves furiously
Onto the legions.

Woe! There was great murder,
And they beat the Cohorts
Merely the cavalry
Escaped into the free:
Because they were mounted.

O Quintili, you poor general,
Did you think the world were thus?
He ended up in a swamp
And lost two boots and a sock
And miserably got stuck.

Then he spoke full of anger
To Centurio Titus:
"Comrade, draw your sword,
And run me through from behind"
'cause everything's kaput."

In the poor roman army,
There served as volunteer
Scaevola, a student of aw,
Who was simply captured
And like all the others,
It went bad with him.
'ere he was hanged,
He was run through the tongue and heart,
And nailed backwards
On his corpus iuris.

When the murdering was at an end,
Prince Herrman rubbed his hands
And to celebrate the victory,
He invited the Cherusci
To a great breakfast.

There was game and ham from Westfalia,
Beer, as much as they could drink.
And in feasting too he was a hero,
Yet his wife Thusneld too
Drank like a Valkyrie

Only in Rome there was no party mood,
But people bought mourning clothes.
Just as, during luncheon,
Augustus was seated in the imperial hall,
The dire news arrived.

First, from sheer shock,
A bit of peacock stuck in his throat,
Then he lost his temper,
And yelled: Varus, curse on you!
Redde legiones!

His German slave, Schmidt by name,
Thought: "The mice'll bite you,
Should you ever get them back,
That which lies around dead
Does not get up alive."

Who has managed to write this song?
A student has sung it.
In Westfalia, he has drunk a lot,
And because of national pride,
he made this song.