Posts: 415
Threads: 58
Joined: Feb 2007
Reputation:
0
highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Furious, he turned on his siren and his flashing lights, but when nothing happened he guessed she was concentrating too hard on her handiwork to even notice him.
The trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled at the top of his lungs, "PULL OVER!"
"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "SCARF!"
My apologies, I found it funny.
Titvs Calidivs Agricola
Wes Olson
Twas a woman that drove me to drink, and I never thanked her. W.C. Fields
Posts: 630
Threads: 42
Joined: Jan 2007
Reputation:
0
:lol:
You are driving in a car at a constant speed. On your left side is a 'drop off' (The ground is 18-20 inches below the level you are traveling on), and on your right side is a fire engine traveling at the same speed as you. In front of you is a galloping horse which is the same size as your car and you cannot overtake it. Behind you is a large rampant elephant. Both horse and elephant are also traveling at the same speed as you. What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation?
..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
.
.
..
.
.
Get your drunken ass off the merry-go-round now!
:oops:
Sorry...
Memmia AKA Joanne Wenlock.
Friends of Letocetum
Posts: 317
Threads: 19
Joined: Nov 2006
Reputation:
0
:lol: :lol: :lol: Those were both great! Thanks for posting them.
Maius/Bill
Marcus Petronius Maius
LEG XIIII GEMINA COH VI
_____________________
Bill Lund
Posts: 245
Threads: 41
Joined: Jun 2006
Reputation:
0
Ah, Ah, Ah, Ah...very funny :lol:
Thank you both
Visit my Website at
[url:n6bls2l1]http://ilustro.webs.com/[/url]
Posts: 7,668
Threads: 117
Joined: Apr 2005
Reputation:
0
A man is stopped for speeding. The officer asks for his license, proof of insurance and registration. He replies, "Well, my license was revoked after my third drunken driving conviction, and frankly, I don't know where the owner of the car keeps his documents. In fact, I've murdered him and am looking for a good place to dump the body, which I'm carrying in the trunk."
The officer says to himself, "I'm going to need some backup." So he radios for help. A group of police cars shows up. The sergeant says to the driver, "Sir, will you open your trunk?" The driver says, "Of course." It's empty except for a spare tire, and a couple of tools.
The sergeant says, "Do you have a license, sir?" The driver says, "Certainly" and produces it from his wallet. "I'll bet you want to see my insurance and registration, too. Here it is."
The sergeant says, "But this officer said..." and relates the story.
The driver says, "Yeah, and I'll bet that liar said I was speeding, too, didn't he?"
M. Demetrius Abicio
(David Wills)
Saepe veritas est dura.
