02-12-2009, 08:40 PM
I've written a play!
Well, actually to be honest, it was written and performed around two years ago at our annual 'Saturnalia' event but I never got around to mentioning it here until now.
On a serious level, I decided to do what the Ancients did and take a popular mythological subject and put a new twist on it, at the same time making sure that the ancient convention of only using three actors to take all of the roles was strictly adhered to.
On a less than serious level - this play was planned to be anything but serious.
Naturally, if any of you feel inspired and wish to perform my play yourselves, feel absolutley free. Just remember to make sure my name (my real one in this case) is on it somewhere.
Well, before we see the play itself, considering that many people prefer to read a review prior to seeing a play, I present here the one and only review which appeared anywhere that I know of, by my good friend and comiles Sextilius. The sheets of newspaper he mentions had been cunningly folded into hats / helmets by the way and the "mop" is the wig I so carefully created to make the female characters look truly feminine (along with a sandwich board sign reading "CENSORED").
" There followed ‘The Entertainment’. Traditionally this is an all male show, the girls just sit back and laugh at us making ourselves even more foolish than usual; although sometimes they do take pity on us and grace the proceedings with some delightful piece of their own. Volusia is into belly dancing as part of her keep fit campaign and did a short number balancing a sword on her head. The lads did a poem or three and some songs and ‘Aeneas’, a three act play for nine people, performed by three men, two sheets of newspaper, a mop head, a couple of ‘crowns’ seeking refuge from a party cracker, a broom-stale, and a chunk of cardboard subtly disguised as a ship. More Laurel and Hardy than ‘Classical New Comedy’ it had the audience in fits of laughter."
Before we proceed to the play itself, a note on the division of parts.
First actor - Aeneas
Second actor - Diomedes, Ascanius, Livinia
Third actor - Venus, Anchises, Dido, King Latinus, Turnus
Here, then, follows the play itself. Have fun!
AENEAS, in three acts
(With apologies to Virgil)
Dramatis personae
Aeneas - A Trojan hero and a man with a destiny
Diomedes - A powerful Greek hero.
Venus - The goddess of love and Aeneas’ mum
Anchises - Aeneas’ old and infirm father
Ascanius - Aeneas’ small son
Dido - The queen of Carthage (and apparently a pretty good singer)
King Latinus - The local king in Italy
Princess Lavinia - King Latinus’ really rather comely daughter
Turnus - An Italian hero. Leader of the Rutilians
Act 1
Scene 1
(Aeneas, Achilles, Venus)
Aeneas – I am Aeneas!
Diomedes - I am Diomedes!
Diomedes - I see before me a crowd of dirty scummy Trojans!
Aeneas - I can see before me a crowd of stinking Greeks!
Diomedes - I am Diomedes, the strongest hero in Greece, and I will win this battle for Achaia and Greece!
Aeneas - I am Aeneas! I am a Trojan! And I am nearly as heroic as Hector (as long as there’s no-one around to say otherwise). I am the son of Venus and I have DESTINY! I will stop you and throw you and your stinking Greeks back into the sea.
They fight. Diomedes is much better than Aeneas, who retreats under the onslaught.
Venus - I am Venus! The goddess of love. Oh no. That’s my son out there playing with that dirty Greek. I’m not going to put up with that for one moment. Aeneas! You stop playing with that dirty Greek and come inside this instant!
Aeneas - I can’t Mum. I’m busy fighting Diomedes right now.
Venus - We’ll see about that then!
She marches forward, grabs Aeneas and drags him away.
Venus - Come with me my boy!
Aeneas - Aw Mum!
Scene 2
(Aeneas, Anchises, Ascanius)
Anchaises - I am Anchises. I am Aeneas’ decrepit old dad.
Aeneas - Hi Dad.
Ascanius - I am Ascanius. I am Aeneas’ son. I am a big boy now because I am nearly out of nappies and I can make the same annoying noise for twenty minutes without getting bored.
Anchises - Son! The Greeks are knocking down the walls of Troy and despoiling all the holy places.
Aeneas - Oh!
Anchises - Bloody vandals!
Aeneas - Don’t use that sort of language around my son.
Anchises - What’s that son? Well I think we should be going then.
Aeneas - Okay then Dad. I’ll hold Ascanius’ hand and you follow up behind with Creusa my wife.
Anchises - I’m feeling a bit decrepit right now. I’d rather get a piggy back from you.
Aeneas - Oh all right. Up we get then.
Aeneas helps Anchises up onto his back and takes Ascanius by the hand. They move off.
Aeneas - Oh, I forgot. Where is my wife Creusa? Dad, was she with you?
Anchises - Who’s that son?
Aeneas - Creusa, my wife.
Anchises - No, never heard of him.
Aeneas - No. CREUSA. MY WIFE!
Anchises - Oh her. I thought she was with you.
Aeneas - Oh no, I’ve lost my wife! Oh no, oh no.
Anchises - Never mind son. We’ll get you another one in the morning.
Aeneas - Oh, alright then. Never mind. Off we go again then.
Act 2
Scene 1
(Aeneas, Anchises, Ascanius)
All three are in a boat
Aeneas - Onward! Onward to destiny,
Ascanius - Weee! Ships are fun! Can we go faster Dad?
Aeneas - Sure son!
Anchises - Ooh, I feel sick. Oh, I am not feeling well. Oh, my head. Oh, my knees. Ohhhh, my HEART!
Anchises clutches his chest, dies and falls overboard.
Aeneas - Hey, Dad! Oh well, on we go. ONWARD TO DESTINY!
Scene 2
(Aeneas, Ascanius, Dido)
The boat arrives in Carthage. Aeneas and Ascanius disembark.
Dido - I am Dido, queen of Carthage.
Aeneas - I am Aeneas, warrior of Troy and man of destiny!
Ascanius - Look Dad, there’s a bumble bee.
Dido - Welcome to my realm brave Aeneas, warrior of Troy. Will you accept our hospitality?
Aeneas - Thanks, I’ll have a pint and we’ll have some cider for the little one.
Dido - My, my. Your foreign customs are strange, but yet I feel strangely compelled to get to know them better.
Aeneas - Even though I have a destiny to fulfil I suddenly feel a great desire to stay and learn more of your local customs too.
Dido - Oh Aeneas!
Aeneas - Oh Dido!
They fall into a passionate embrace.
Dido - Aeneas, tell me more about yourself. Tell me about your destiny.
Aeneas - Destiny, destiny…. Yes I am a man of destiny!
Dido - But what IS your destiny?
Aeneas - Um, tricky question that. Let me see. I know! I think I’ll found a city!
Dido - Oh Aeneas, that’s fabulous. Where will you found your city?
Aeneas - I think I will found it here. That’s it! I’m going to found Carthage!
Dido - But Carthage has been founded already, and I’m the queen.
Aeneas - Oh, I hadn’t thought of that. Oh well, I must be off then – I HAVE A DESTINY TO FULFIL.
Dido - But Aeneas, what about this beautiful thing we have together?
Aeneas - Stand aside woman, I have to fulfil my destiny to found a city, which I think I shall call … ah ... ROME.
Dido - Oh no! Not ROME! Not that infernal city my beloved Carthage will have to submit to in the far future.
Aeneas - Sorry Dido. It’s been nice but I have to go. Come on Ascanius, we’re going.
Ascanius - Can we stay for chocolate and ice cream?
Aeneas - No, they haven’t been invented yet. Let’s go. We have a destiny to fulfil.
They go back to the boat and sail away.
Dido - Oh no, my heart is broken. Aeneas has left me and there is no chocolate or ice cream to take comfort in. I cannot go on like this! I feel I must die. Ohh ohh, I feel the flames already!
She strikes a match, sees the flame and dies an agonising death.
Act 3
Scene 1
(Aeneas, Ascanius, King Latinus, Princess Lavinia, Turnus)
Aeneas and Ascanius arrive in Italy. They get out of the boat.
King Latinus - I am King Latinus, leader of the Latins and ruler of this very small and insignificant coastal area of Italy.
Aeneas - I am Aeneas, warrior of Troy and man of destiny!
Ascanius - Look – there’s a pretty butterfly. Can I catch it and stick pins in it?
He runs off.
King Latinus - Greetings Aeneas. You appear to be a strong and fine specimen of humanity. I detect that you have virtue and piety running through your veins and do not believe in frivolous things like horse racing, trousers and non existent chocolate. You seem to be the sum of what the future will hold. Do you want to marry my daughter Lavinia?
Lavinia enters
Lavinia - Aw, Dad. He looks so old and uncool. I want to shack up with Turnus and hang out with his Rutilians instead.
Aeneas - What a sweet young daughter you have. I accept your offer.
Lavinia - This is sooo unfair! I’m going over to Turnus’s. Don’t expect me back!
She leaves
King Latinus - Ah, children.
Aeneas - Right then, shall we start making the arrangements for the wedding?
King Latinus - First, tell me of your destiny.
Aeneas - My destiny …. Ah yes! I am going to found a great city. CALLED ROME!
King Latinus suddenly looks less enthusiastic.
King Latinus - Ahh - good. Right-oh then. I’ll direct you to some land over there, far enough from the borders of my land and comfortably close to those horrible boozy Rutilians for you to build your city. Once you’re comfortably up and running we can talk about wedding plans.
King Latinus walks off, talking in a stage whisper.
King Latinus - Now where did I put that wax tablet I received from Rutilia last month?
Lavinia returns with Turnus
Lavinia - There he is Turnus. That’s the old wrinkly Dad wants to pack me off with!
Turnus - No way! There’s no way I’m letting him get away with you! You’re too precious to me.
Lavinia - Ahh, Turnus. Let’s go away somewhere we can be together were he and Dad won’t find us.
Turnus - Suits me. Let’s go then.
They leave.
Scene 2
(Aeneas, Ascanius, Turnus, Lavinia
Aeneas - Here I am at last. This is where I can fulfil my destiny and found the great city of Rome.
Ascanius - I’m a big boy now. When we have the new city can I be the king of the castle?
Aeneas - My son Ascanius, I will make you the father of the new nation of the Romans. I think I will let you have two sons called Romulus and Remus so you can immediately lose them and leave them to be brought up by wolves. In that way we will build a great nation from the ashes of Troy.
Ascanius - When Romulus and Remus come, can I play with them?
Aeneas - No, you must lose them so that history will turn out right.
Ascanius - Dad, when we build Rome, what are we going to call it?
Aeneas - Um – I think a good name for our new city of Rome would be … Alba Longa.
Ascanius - Goody goody.
Aeneas - Run along now and play.
Ascanius leaves
Aeneas - Ah well. I suppose I had better get started on this city. I think I will build some houses first for the people to live in. Come to think of it, where do I find the people who are going to live here?
Turnus and Lavinia arrive at the scene.
Laviania - Hey Turnus, that wrinkly old Trojan is trying to dig up your land.
Turnus - Hey you! Trojan! What do you think you are doing?
Aeneas - I am founding the city of Rome at Alba Longa.
Turnus - Not on my land you’re not!
Lavinia - Go on Turnus – send him back to wherever he came from.
Aeneas - I am founding the sacred city of Rome. If you defile it I shall have to kill you.
Turnus - You and who else? Go on Granddad, give it your best shot.
Lavinia - Ohh, I can’t watch this.
She leaves.
Aeneas - Turnus of the Rutilians, I am Aeneas, warrior of Troy, man of destiny and founder of Rome at Alba Longa. I will build this city and marry Lavinia, daughter of King Latinus and you will not stop me.
Turnus - Oh yes I will old man. I will send you back into the sea where you came from and marry Lavinia myself. Then, when her stupid old dad dies I will be king of the Latins as well as the Rutilians.
Aeneas - You dastardly plotter! Have you told her this?
Turnus - No, but who cares? She doesn’t like you anyway.
He lunges at Aeneas. They fight.
Aeneas - You can’t beat me you know. If I strike you down you will cease to exist, but if you are beaten by me I will grow stronger than you can imagine.
Turnus - Oh no, I can feel the power of destiny on me.
Aeneas - Yes, I told you I was the man of destiny.
Turnus - Oh no, I can feel my power waning before the onslaught of the glorius future of Rome.
Aeneas delivers the killing blow. Turnus cries out and staggers off.
Lavinia re-enters.
Lavinia - Oh no, what have you done?
Aeneas - I have freed you from the tyranny of backwardness and body odour.
King Latinus enters.
King Latinus - Well well. Well done Aeneas. It looks as if I will have to have you for a son in law after all.
Aeneas - King Latinus, I am honoured you think so highly of me. In your honour then I will stop speaking this Trojan language which no one remembers any more and speak only Latin from now on.
King Latinus - In that case, long live Rome and the Roman people.
Aeneas - Ita, viva Roma et populari romani.
Lavinia - This is so unfair.
The end
Well, actually to be honest, it was written and performed around two years ago at our annual 'Saturnalia' event but I never got around to mentioning it here until now.
On a serious level, I decided to do what the Ancients did and take a popular mythological subject and put a new twist on it, at the same time making sure that the ancient convention of only using three actors to take all of the roles was strictly adhered to.
On a less than serious level - this play was planned to be anything but serious.
Naturally, if any of you feel inspired and wish to perform my play yourselves, feel absolutley free. Just remember to make sure my name (my real one in this case) is on it somewhere.
Well, before we see the play itself, considering that many people prefer to read a review prior to seeing a play, I present here the one and only review which appeared anywhere that I know of, by my good friend and comiles Sextilius. The sheets of newspaper he mentions had been cunningly folded into hats / helmets by the way and the "mop" is the wig I so carefully created to make the female characters look truly feminine (along with a sandwich board sign reading "CENSORED").
" There followed ‘The Entertainment’. Traditionally this is an all male show, the girls just sit back and laugh at us making ourselves even more foolish than usual; although sometimes they do take pity on us and grace the proceedings with some delightful piece of their own. Volusia is into belly dancing as part of her keep fit campaign and did a short number balancing a sword on her head. The lads did a poem or three and some songs and ‘Aeneas’, a three act play for nine people, performed by three men, two sheets of newspaper, a mop head, a couple of ‘crowns’ seeking refuge from a party cracker, a broom-stale, and a chunk of cardboard subtly disguised as a ship. More Laurel and Hardy than ‘Classical New Comedy’ it had the audience in fits of laughter."
Before we proceed to the play itself, a note on the division of parts.
First actor - Aeneas
Second actor - Diomedes, Ascanius, Livinia
Third actor - Venus, Anchises, Dido, King Latinus, Turnus
Here, then, follows the play itself. Have fun!
AENEAS, in three acts
(With apologies to Virgil)
Dramatis personae
Aeneas - A Trojan hero and a man with a destiny
Diomedes - A powerful Greek hero.
Venus - The goddess of love and Aeneas’ mum
Anchises - Aeneas’ old and infirm father
Ascanius - Aeneas’ small son
Dido - The queen of Carthage (and apparently a pretty good singer)
King Latinus - The local king in Italy
Princess Lavinia - King Latinus’ really rather comely daughter
Turnus - An Italian hero. Leader of the Rutilians
Act 1
Scene 1
(Aeneas, Achilles, Venus)
Aeneas – I am Aeneas!
Diomedes - I am Diomedes!
Diomedes - I see before me a crowd of dirty scummy Trojans!
Aeneas - I can see before me a crowd of stinking Greeks!
Diomedes - I am Diomedes, the strongest hero in Greece, and I will win this battle for Achaia and Greece!
Aeneas - I am Aeneas! I am a Trojan! And I am nearly as heroic as Hector (as long as there’s no-one around to say otherwise). I am the son of Venus and I have DESTINY! I will stop you and throw you and your stinking Greeks back into the sea.
They fight. Diomedes is much better than Aeneas, who retreats under the onslaught.
Venus - I am Venus! The goddess of love. Oh no. That’s my son out there playing with that dirty Greek. I’m not going to put up with that for one moment. Aeneas! You stop playing with that dirty Greek and come inside this instant!
Aeneas - I can’t Mum. I’m busy fighting Diomedes right now.
Venus - We’ll see about that then!
She marches forward, grabs Aeneas and drags him away.
Venus - Come with me my boy!
Aeneas - Aw Mum!
Scene 2
(Aeneas, Anchises, Ascanius)
Anchaises - I am Anchises. I am Aeneas’ decrepit old dad.
Aeneas - Hi Dad.
Ascanius - I am Ascanius. I am Aeneas’ son. I am a big boy now because I am nearly out of nappies and I can make the same annoying noise for twenty minutes without getting bored.
Anchises - Son! The Greeks are knocking down the walls of Troy and despoiling all the holy places.
Aeneas - Oh!
Anchises - Bloody vandals!
Aeneas - Don’t use that sort of language around my son.
Anchises - What’s that son? Well I think we should be going then.
Aeneas - Okay then Dad. I’ll hold Ascanius’ hand and you follow up behind with Creusa my wife.
Anchises - I’m feeling a bit decrepit right now. I’d rather get a piggy back from you.
Aeneas - Oh all right. Up we get then.
Aeneas helps Anchises up onto his back and takes Ascanius by the hand. They move off.
Aeneas - Oh, I forgot. Where is my wife Creusa? Dad, was she with you?
Anchises - Who’s that son?
Aeneas - Creusa, my wife.
Anchises - No, never heard of him.
Aeneas - No. CREUSA. MY WIFE!
Anchises - Oh her. I thought she was with you.
Aeneas - Oh no, I’ve lost my wife! Oh no, oh no.
Anchises - Never mind son. We’ll get you another one in the morning.
Aeneas - Oh, alright then. Never mind. Off we go again then.
Act 2
Scene 1
(Aeneas, Anchises, Ascanius)
All three are in a boat
Aeneas - Onward! Onward to destiny,
Ascanius - Weee! Ships are fun! Can we go faster Dad?
Aeneas - Sure son!
Anchises - Ooh, I feel sick. Oh, I am not feeling well. Oh, my head. Oh, my knees. Ohhhh, my HEART!
Anchises clutches his chest, dies and falls overboard.
Aeneas - Hey, Dad! Oh well, on we go. ONWARD TO DESTINY!
Scene 2
(Aeneas, Ascanius, Dido)
The boat arrives in Carthage. Aeneas and Ascanius disembark.
Dido - I am Dido, queen of Carthage.
Aeneas - I am Aeneas, warrior of Troy and man of destiny!
Ascanius - Look Dad, there’s a bumble bee.
Dido - Welcome to my realm brave Aeneas, warrior of Troy. Will you accept our hospitality?
Aeneas - Thanks, I’ll have a pint and we’ll have some cider for the little one.
Dido - My, my. Your foreign customs are strange, but yet I feel strangely compelled to get to know them better.
Aeneas - Even though I have a destiny to fulfil I suddenly feel a great desire to stay and learn more of your local customs too.
Dido - Oh Aeneas!
Aeneas - Oh Dido!
They fall into a passionate embrace.
Dido - Aeneas, tell me more about yourself. Tell me about your destiny.
Aeneas - Destiny, destiny…. Yes I am a man of destiny!
Dido - But what IS your destiny?
Aeneas - Um, tricky question that. Let me see. I know! I think I’ll found a city!
Dido - Oh Aeneas, that’s fabulous. Where will you found your city?
Aeneas - I think I will found it here. That’s it! I’m going to found Carthage!
Dido - But Carthage has been founded already, and I’m the queen.
Aeneas - Oh, I hadn’t thought of that. Oh well, I must be off then – I HAVE A DESTINY TO FULFIL.
Dido - But Aeneas, what about this beautiful thing we have together?
Aeneas - Stand aside woman, I have to fulfil my destiny to found a city, which I think I shall call … ah ... ROME.
Dido - Oh no! Not ROME! Not that infernal city my beloved Carthage will have to submit to in the far future.
Aeneas - Sorry Dido. It’s been nice but I have to go. Come on Ascanius, we’re going.
Ascanius - Can we stay for chocolate and ice cream?
Aeneas - No, they haven’t been invented yet. Let’s go. We have a destiny to fulfil.
They go back to the boat and sail away.
Dido - Oh no, my heart is broken. Aeneas has left me and there is no chocolate or ice cream to take comfort in. I cannot go on like this! I feel I must die. Ohh ohh, I feel the flames already!
She strikes a match, sees the flame and dies an agonising death.
Act 3
Scene 1
(Aeneas, Ascanius, King Latinus, Princess Lavinia, Turnus)
Aeneas and Ascanius arrive in Italy. They get out of the boat.
King Latinus - I am King Latinus, leader of the Latins and ruler of this very small and insignificant coastal area of Italy.
Aeneas - I am Aeneas, warrior of Troy and man of destiny!
Ascanius - Look – there’s a pretty butterfly. Can I catch it and stick pins in it?
He runs off.
King Latinus - Greetings Aeneas. You appear to be a strong and fine specimen of humanity. I detect that you have virtue and piety running through your veins and do not believe in frivolous things like horse racing, trousers and non existent chocolate. You seem to be the sum of what the future will hold. Do you want to marry my daughter Lavinia?
Lavinia enters
Lavinia - Aw, Dad. He looks so old and uncool. I want to shack up with Turnus and hang out with his Rutilians instead.
Aeneas - What a sweet young daughter you have. I accept your offer.
Lavinia - This is sooo unfair! I’m going over to Turnus’s. Don’t expect me back!
She leaves
King Latinus - Ah, children.
Aeneas - Right then, shall we start making the arrangements for the wedding?
King Latinus - First, tell me of your destiny.
Aeneas - My destiny …. Ah yes! I am going to found a great city. CALLED ROME!
King Latinus suddenly looks less enthusiastic.
King Latinus - Ahh - good. Right-oh then. I’ll direct you to some land over there, far enough from the borders of my land and comfortably close to those horrible boozy Rutilians for you to build your city. Once you’re comfortably up and running we can talk about wedding plans.
King Latinus walks off, talking in a stage whisper.
King Latinus - Now where did I put that wax tablet I received from Rutilia last month?
Lavinia returns with Turnus
Lavinia - There he is Turnus. That’s the old wrinkly Dad wants to pack me off with!
Turnus - No way! There’s no way I’m letting him get away with you! You’re too precious to me.
Lavinia - Ahh, Turnus. Let’s go away somewhere we can be together were he and Dad won’t find us.
Turnus - Suits me. Let’s go then.
They leave.
Scene 2
(Aeneas, Ascanius, Turnus, Lavinia
Aeneas - Here I am at last. This is where I can fulfil my destiny and found the great city of Rome.
Ascanius - I’m a big boy now. When we have the new city can I be the king of the castle?
Aeneas - My son Ascanius, I will make you the father of the new nation of the Romans. I think I will let you have two sons called Romulus and Remus so you can immediately lose them and leave them to be brought up by wolves. In that way we will build a great nation from the ashes of Troy.
Ascanius - When Romulus and Remus come, can I play with them?
Aeneas - No, you must lose them so that history will turn out right.
Ascanius - Dad, when we build Rome, what are we going to call it?
Aeneas - Um – I think a good name for our new city of Rome would be … Alba Longa.
Ascanius - Goody goody.
Aeneas - Run along now and play.
Ascanius leaves
Aeneas - Ah well. I suppose I had better get started on this city. I think I will build some houses first for the people to live in. Come to think of it, where do I find the people who are going to live here?
Turnus and Lavinia arrive at the scene.
Laviania - Hey Turnus, that wrinkly old Trojan is trying to dig up your land.
Turnus - Hey you! Trojan! What do you think you are doing?
Aeneas - I am founding the city of Rome at Alba Longa.
Turnus - Not on my land you’re not!
Lavinia - Go on Turnus – send him back to wherever he came from.
Aeneas - I am founding the sacred city of Rome. If you defile it I shall have to kill you.
Turnus - You and who else? Go on Granddad, give it your best shot.
Lavinia - Ohh, I can’t watch this.
She leaves.
Aeneas - Turnus of the Rutilians, I am Aeneas, warrior of Troy, man of destiny and founder of Rome at Alba Longa. I will build this city and marry Lavinia, daughter of King Latinus and you will not stop me.
Turnus - Oh yes I will old man. I will send you back into the sea where you came from and marry Lavinia myself. Then, when her stupid old dad dies I will be king of the Latins as well as the Rutilians.
Aeneas - You dastardly plotter! Have you told her this?
Turnus - No, but who cares? She doesn’t like you anyway.
He lunges at Aeneas. They fight.
Aeneas - You can’t beat me you know. If I strike you down you will cease to exist, but if you are beaten by me I will grow stronger than you can imagine.
Turnus - Oh no, I can feel the power of destiny on me.
Aeneas - Yes, I told you I was the man of destiny.
Turnus - Oh no, I can feel my power waning before the onslaught of the glorius future of Rome.
Aeneas delivers the killing blow. Turnus cries out and staggers off.
Lavinia re-enters.
Lavinia - Oh no, what have you done?
Aeneas - I have freed you from the tyranny of backwardness and body odour.
King Latinus enters.
King Latinus - Well well. Well done Aeneas. It looks as if I will have to have you for a son in law after all.
Aeneas - King Latinus, I am honoured you think so highly of me. In your honour then I will stop speaking this Trojan language which no one remembers any more and speak only Latin from now on.
King Latinus - In that case, long live Rome and the Roman people.
Aeneas - Ita, viva Roma et populari romani.
Lavinia - This is so unfair.
The end
Who is called \'\'Paul\'\' by no-one other than his wife, parents and brothers. :!: <img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_exclaim.gif" alt=":!:" title="Exclamation" />:!:
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<a class="postlink" href="http://www.romanarmy.net">www.romanarmy.net
hock: :lol:
